The Gibbering Demon Test

Imagination is a muscle. It's something you've got to exercise in order to keep it toned. This is why so many adults seem to have lost most of their imagination. They either don't have or don't take enough time in the day to use it. I'm just as susceptible to this as anyone else. In fact, usually when I try to visualize something incredible, what usually ends up happening in my head looks like a reasonably-good-but-still-obvious-CGI-special-effect version of it, which frustrates me to no end. Seriously, why would my mind’s eye immediately concoct something that looks like it was pieced together by someone on an iMac? The only thing I can guess is that, now that just about every special effect in television and the movies is done by, or *can* be done by, computers, we see so much more of it. CGI has a look that is good, but you still notice on an almost subconscious level. Things don’t move quite right, or don’t have enough weight to them. It's even gotten to the point where you start to see CGI effects where there aren't any. Try this for fun: the next time you watch a TV show, see if you can figure out whether one of the characters is being greenscreened in. Even if none of them are, inside of a minute you'll start to notice things that make them look like they could be.

Anyway, there's something that I do from time to time to try to stave off the effects of too much of not doing my own imagining. It's a little mental status check, a way to reboot the imagination a little bit, and it all stems from a world mythology book that I read back in middle school. There was a section that gave examples and drawings of other cultures' ideas about ghosts and demons, and one I remember in particular was a "gibbering demon" from India. Their purpose, if I'm remembering this correctly, is to come at night to people who have done something wrong, and whisper incessantly into their ears until the sound drives them mad with guilt and they confess. Basically, a horrific version of Jiminy Cricket. These creatures, the book said, were about five inches high, scarlet red, and, like many other Indian deities, are in possession of several sets of arms. I remember the image that they had in the book... it had the face of a tusked, mad-eyed half-animal.

When I read the book as a kid, the sight of it sent a shiver up my spine. It was so exotic, weird, and terrible-sounding. And for just a moment, I started to wonder what it would be like to meet up with one of those things. I actually looked up from the book toward the open doorway of the room where I was reading, and I had a sudden vivid idea of what it would look like if such a thing were to suddenly walk in. To be clear, I didn't actually believe that I was seeing one, but I had a very clear idea of what it *would* look like. I could imagine every detail... the tiny red demon, lumbering from side to side with each step from the weight of all those arms, muttering its mad language to itself in a barely audible voice as it made its way into the room. I could even envision the way its feet would sink a little bit into the carpet.

It came to me with such perfect clarity that I've tried to hang onto that clarity, some thirty years later. Every once in a while, if I'm just sitting in a room, I'll take a look at a doorway or corner and try to call back that little demon with the same quality it had the first time. There have been times in my life when I've been able to somewhat approximate the experience I had the first time, and there have been others when it's ended up looking like a crappy special effect (one time, it even looked very specifically like a Ray Harryhausen-style stop motion effect). But it never fails to appear when I need it, and I take that as a positive thing, that I'm at least able to hold on to a little bit of the imagination I had when I was a kid.

What I think this personal mental test is trying to tell me, after all this time, is that the ability to imagine is still there. Of course, it can't be as clear as it was when I was a teenager, and the combination of just figuring out how the world really is with my constant influx of fantastical thoughts and images created something so potent. But at least I've got the test of the gibbering demon to help me tap back into it.